1. After the duds I have seen of yours I wouldn’t mind giving your movies a miss.
Ans: Oh Noooooo! I beg you with tears in my eyes not to do that. Please forgive me for the films you did not like. I swear on you and your family that I will try not to disappoint you next time. Please please please don’t deprive me of my livelihood.
2. Why don’t you take Nagarujuna for one character in Rann?
Ans: Why don’t you keep your casting genius for yourself when you make your own film?
3. Technical stuff is fine but the correct criteria for a film is the story.
Ans: Oh My! What wisdom.
4. I think there are a few influences of Atlas Shrugged and Fountainhead in the characters of Rann.
Ans: Some of them you are bang on. Anyway I am truly impressed with your observations.
5. What are your favourite books apart from Ayn Rand and Nietzsche?
Ans: Apart from Ayn Rand, Nietzsche and James Hadley Chase my most favourite books are Mario Puzo’s Godfather, quite a few of Fredrick Forsyth’s, the bitchy parts of Jackie Collins books and the sexiest excerpts from Harrold Robbins novels. But what influenced me the most is the Mad magazine.
6. Whatever must happen ultimately should happen immediately. – Henry Kissinger.
Ans: Whatever people think should happen immediately make them think that it will happen ultimately. – RAMGOPAL VARMA.
P.S: It’s on this con I managed to run my career so far. (Mujhe pata hai ki mujhe foren hit film banana hai, lekin main kabhi na kabhie zaroor bana doonga).
7. Is there any significance for the red colour in the poster of Rann? I liked that the best.
Ans: Nothing except that it looked the best from the designers 3 options of red, green and black.
8. Something cannot emerge from nothing.
Ans: On the contrary if anything emerges with enough impact, people will imagine that there is something to it. That is the birth of all conspiracy theories.
9. Why does the Tantrik in Phoonk say “ghatia sawal mat poonch” instead of explaining?
Ans: Because I didn’t know the explanation.
10. Would you have been as nasty to someone who gives you Diwali greetings if he happened to be Big B?
Ans: As he knows me too well Big B won’t be dumb enough to give me such inane greetings.
11. Your comment on women in two words?
Ans: Two words are too many.
12. Will you show women nude if censor permits?
13. You seem to be doing what you enjoy!
14. Do you pay Income Tax?
Ans: I will tell you only if you swear on your mother that you are not from the Tax department.
15. What was the first reaction of Amitji to you, 2nd and then nth reaction?
Ans: I think the first reaction was of intrigue, the 2nd time he suspected that I am a crackpot and now he is convinced that I am raving lunatic.
16. Can a pair of nice legs, heaving bosoms, slim waist and voluptuous butt make up for a bad scene?
Ans: I don’t know about a scene, but if your sexuality is in the right place it sure can greatly spice up your life.
17. I swear on your and my mother I will never wish you happy birthday.
Ans: Ha Ha.
18. You need to cater to an audience at the end of the day and the investors have to profit.
Ans: Let the audience worry about what they want to see.
Let me worry about what I want to make.
Let the investors worry about their profit.
And you worry about yourself.
19. Why do you think we get entertained when two parties fight?
Ans: It sure breaks the monotony of life.
20. What do you like in a James Bond movie?
Ans: Guns and butts.
21. Are you gay?
Ans: Do you read gossip?
22. Do you know you have given people like me the courage to face a life-time.
Ans: I am truly happy to know that but just remember it’s not about facing life but it’s about flowing with it. Life, time and destiny do not stop for anybody. It’s up to you to understand it and use its strength as an addition to your own individual strength.
23. Your poster designs and promos are always good. It’s the movie which sucks.
Ans: Aw! Come on! 2 out of 3 ain’t that bad.
24. What do you think of Swami Vivekananda?
Ans: Who is he?
25. What is your philosophy of life and your idea of a perfect life?
Ans: Not to think too much and to do what you think.
26. You are basically a brilliant educated goonda.
Ans: Superb. I am thrilled with your insight and for a change I truly mean it.
27. You are a rebel without a cause.
Ans: I have a very clear-cut cause namely my own gratification or in more simpler words to just have one hell of a ball of a life.