The Biggest Flop of my Life

Just felt like sharing this one personal experience of mine. It has nothing to do with films. So those of you who are not interested can get off right now.
Sometime in 1994 I just returned from Chennai to Hyderabad in the morning and was supposed to catch a flight to Mumbai in the evening. I was taking a nap in the afternoon when my sister suddenly woke me up and told me my distant cousin Bujji from Bhimavaram was on the phone. (Those days there were no cell phones yet.). I wondered why she woke me up for that and she said Bujji says it’s very urgent. Curious as Bujji was not even that close to me, I went to the phone and Bujji said that Dad had a heart attack and died, and before I could say anything he asked me if I was alone. When I said ‘no’ as my mom and sister were there near me, he asked me to come outside and call him from another phone. I started walking towards a STD booth at the end of the road with my brother-in-law following me. I was wondering why Bujji is being so secretive about his dad having a heart attack and dying. As I was nearing the booth it slowly started dawning upon me that he was talking about my dad. I turned around and asked my brother-in-law where my dad was and he said he went to Bhimavaram the previous day.
My fear being confirmed I called up Bujji and he told me the same and asked me whether we would be coming there or should he bring the body. I told him to bring the body. I turned around and told my brother-in-law about what happened and he just sat down on the road in shock. I personally was not feeling anything as I was seriously thinking about how to break the news to my mother. I quickly made a few calls to some relatives and told them that they will get to hear it from somewhere sooner or later and asked them not to come to my house till I prepare my mother.
Then in the walk back I thought of a story to tell my mother. I told her that Dad suffered some pain in the chest and I asked them to bring him to Hyderabad as there are better medical facilities here. When she got panicky I told her cheerfully that he is perfectly fine. My whole intention was to reduce the time of her crying before the body reaches and also for me to have time to plan how to make her slowly absorb the final shock. I literally went about doing a screenplay of sorts, sent some guys to the end of the road to stop any over enthusiastic relatives coming to console her and I made a friend of mine do mock phone conversations in front of my mother as if he is talking to people who are bringing my father and to say that the pain is increasing. That was my way of attempting to bring my mother slowly closer to the ultimate truth.
Finally this whole exercise happened till 11in the night and I went off to sleep. So far I have not felt anything at all as I was too busy doing scenes around to cushion my mother. At around my cousin woke me up and said the body is here. I came out and saw the car on the road in which they brought the body, and that’s when the reality first hit me. I told my cousin to take the car to his house and only bring it in the morning so that we can quickly do the funeral arrangements in the morning and spare my mother from the trauma of sitting with the body till the morning. Morning around my grandfather broke the news to my mother and by that time seeing all the activity building around I am sure she suspected it.
My uncle came and told me that my father has written a will that he wants to donate his eyes and body. My relatives told me to ignore that will and just do the rites as per traditions. I said I want to do as per my father’s wishes, and I went in and told my mother if she will have any objection to me going as per dad’s wishes. She asked me to do whatever I thought was right even as she was crying. I called the eye institute guys and two young nurses landed up in rickshaw. I still remember them laughing, as they got out of the rickshaw, at some private joke between each other. Their cheerful laughter contrasted so macaberly against the crying sounds and the somber look of the entire atmosphere. They sent everyone out, did whatever technical procedure to take the eyes and after they left my people told me it’s time to take the body to the hospital, I went in to see my mother next to the body of my father and there was a redness around his eyes and a slit which was angled because of whatever the girls from the institute did to take out the eyes.
I felt a tremendous guilt and anger against myself that I subjected my mother to see a man who she lived with for 40 years that way for the last time especially since she always used to talk about how much she loved my father’s eyes. That decision I have taken just in the name of fulfilling my father’s wishes, but I failed to foresee what the practical application of that procedure will subject my mother too. This I think is the biggest flop I made in my life.
Next day I told my mother let’s not do any 7th day or 11th day kind of rituals as we should remember him from happy times and not make an exhibition seeking sympathy. I gave her a long lecture of how she should look at everything positively. The next day I heard my mother crying in her room and I got upset that my lecture didn’t work. In the afternoon I heard a strange sound and when I went upstairs, I saw that it is my brother crying and that’s the first time I ever heard him cry and was thinking to myself that this is how it sounds when he cries. Throughout this entire process I did not feel for one second any grief myself and that was nothing to do with me and my father’s relationship. I loved him and respected him immensely. It’s just that I was in a state of film, for want of a better term.
I went to Mumbai after a few days to meet Naseeruddin Shah as I was casting him in a certain film. As soon as he saw me he got up and said he was very sorry to hear about my mother. Somebody gave him wrong info that it is my mother, so as not to embarrass him I didn’t tell him. Then he went on to talk about his mother and asking questions on how my father was taking it. The fact that I didn’t stop him in the beginning itself it became even more difficult now to tell him that he got it wrong. So I went through the entire comedy.
Years later somewhere in 2003 or so, I was in Pune in Nana Patekar’s house. Me, Nana, Shimit Amin and Sandeep the writer of “Ab Tak Chappan” were doing a script session. In the context of a scene for a reference I started narrating my father’s episode and when I came to the part of the nurses from the eye institute and its aftermath, I suddenly got choked and broke down. Nana had to hold me in his arms to control me. It took me 9 years to cry and that too for more than my father, it was for that biggest flop I made.
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85 Responses to The Biggest Flop of my Life

  1. vinay says:

    Did u ever think why u cry after 9years. Do film makers never respond to instants?

  2. Narendra says:

    God bless you.

  3. Anil says:

    Real biggest Flop of RGVI don\’t think this is your biggest flop. There are couple of dimensions to this event.One thing is you are able to fulfill the wish of your father which is very important.Second thing is you are able to keep alive the beautiful eyes; loved by your mother.Your father is still alive and WATCHING your success.You are a good son to think about your mom continuously even in that very bad situation and fulfilling your father final wish.The failure part is you took DNA from a person, who is having great altruist attitude and wants to help others even after the death. Some how you lost belief in humanity. To show gratitude to your father. Please play your father\’s  role for at least 1 day per year and please do some charity in the name of your father. In this way you can keep your father alive, This shows utmost respect to your father.I don\’t say you are bad guy. You are far far better than 90% of people in this world. I know people Who don\’t do any productive work… Who keep their parents in old age home. Who is having more ugly attitude inside and keep smiles on outside….. Who betrays others in the name of love.. who pulls other legs rather than they growing productively. Who make unnecessary gossips and hurts other person feelings… These are just so called civilized people..  You can share 0.05% of your income to cheer up few people in this world. To give them real happiness rather taking you to your virtual world by movies … Only one day per year, Come out from your virtual world which is filled by girls with beautiful bums, blah .. blah …. – Anil Kumar

  4. Unknown says:

    hi ramu,
    touching story. i guess everyone reacts to personal tragedies in diff ways. i found it amazing that you have shared something which is so personal to yourself, to the whole world. I guess , after denial comes acceptance, and to that order, it took you 9 years to completely get over all the emotions and break down in front of strangers. I think a lot of ppl, including myself are taken aback, by seeing your "human. emotional" side with this post.(which is completely contrary to how you portray yourself to the media). I have always loved your movie and admired your guts of making films which have your stamp on it. for me , you are ballsy original – more than any filmmaker around. keep it going…
    I feel you almost hate being portrayed as a mushy or a senti- guy, and for you to pen this post, is truly unbecoming….
    more power to you to make amazing movies..

  5. VJ says:

    Raamu,I take back my insensitive words abt ur lack of normal human emotions. I was wrong. First of all I must salute ur father who thought abt such altruistic donation (eyes) when eye donation was not a fad then. I admire the way u handled ur mom\’s sensitivity. As for hearing ur elder bratha cry I too heard of my bratha\’s recently when he came to know of his daughter\’s elopement. It sounded strange to me. I now know that under the thick shell of stern looks and poker face lie a gentle Raamu. Some human relations are priceless.==Now I know Raamu why u Directors are very good at small details of storytelling/movie making (based on what u wrote the little story of ur tipped emotion).

  6. Suraj says:

    RGV,I never expected from RGV to blog a topic which adds a new unknown dimension of your personality. The point that strikes here is not you cried after 9 years or your dad\’s will or your mother\’s love for your dad\’s eyes but the thing that strikes me is RGV too can get sentimental.It can be very tough when loved ones part. But having said that one has to face it sometime. Regards,SurajP.S. I feel, you should have corrected Naseer Sir about the mis information he had. Because I wont find any comedy if it had happened with me. Just a suggestion!

  7. Unknown says:

    The best part I like in you is your HONESTY. You maintain the same standard even if someone likes it or hate it. Keep it up dude

  8. martian says:

    if you dont care about poverty, communalism, alcoholism, drug abuse, pollution, etc then what the heck did u like in marxism? or u stopped caring for it after you read ayn rand? why is is tht people get attracted to imarxism when they are young and get over it very soon?

  9. Unknown says:

    As always you have portrayed a positive emotion as negative. I guess what you did on that day was in the state of shock. And as all people tend to, just postpone the feeling of sadness( father\’s death). But one day or the other it has to come out as you have not forgotten it, but just postponed it. For me its Ramu\’s hit

  10. vaishak says:

            This one is a great posting…….thanks…Vaishak…

  11. Hussain says:

    Dear Ramu,                    Trust me that was your biggest Hit, My respect for you has increased multifold, on the way you handled situations and also your final beakdown!!MAN, DEATH-is a STAGE-We have to REACH at some point!!Regards

  12. dipu says:

    Touched…Eyes become moist………

  13. Vijay says:

    Dear Ramu,
    It\’s a very touching experience. Well one thing is it shows all these losers who keep asking you about irrelevant t hings like communalism, socialism and pollution and not to mention your so called flops that you\’re as human as they are and every decision you take can work or not work and thats how life is.
    Just another point though it\’s related to cinema: When are you making your next \’non-horror\’ film. I am allergic to orror films, not because I am scared (far from it), just dont relate to them. I am eagerly waiting for your take on the media. 

  14. Swamy says:

    Last time i cried when i was reading the climax of Paulo Celho\’s "The Zahir".After that,this blog made me cry.This shows how much sensitive energy Ramu is carrying in his heart…which he\’s using to make movies for over 20 years.

  15. Unknown says:

    I still remember the day after your father died. I was 17 years old. I was reading Eenadu Paper. You mentioned how much you respected him and how you used one line of his in Siva Movie. The line told by Murali Mohan to Nagarjuna about \’how to follow ones heart\’ or something like that. Thanks for showing the different side of you in this post.

  16. sandeep says:

    hi rgvthis is real  rgv  …

  17. Naveen says:

    the last paragraph stole the show….feeling lighter?
    but i just can\’t believe you still consider it as your biggest flop

  18. Naveen says:

    you did the right thing!

  19. static atmosphere energy says:

    Are you healed? Have you come in terms with your father\’s demise and does your mother forgive you? Is she healed?

  20. prakash says:

    sir, it wasn\’t a flop of your life. your father must be happy you made his last wish come true (wherever he is). may his soul rest in peace. i appreciate the presence of mind you demonstrated at that hour.

  21. Sivakumar T says:

    Now, I know how you are prolific in story telling. A man who narrates an incident so well as this can never lose his craft.To RGV Detractors… This man can never lose his craft.

  22. karthik says:

    did you do the entire exercise of \’not letting your mother know it\’ so that you can escape the nuisance that she might make and spoil your peace or because you wanted to delay her pain as much as possible. i  think you mentioned the latter as the reason. But could you come again on this please?
    do you think that the nurses should have some basic decency regarding behaviour when they are coming to collect the eyes? or do you think it was fair because they see death everyday?

  23. karthik says:

    you cried after 9 years… that was one long take… but anyway i guess you have let it out… thats the way it should be.

  24. Unknown says:

    Here are
    Two perspectives of the issue:
    One: You intention was doing right thing (fulfilling your father wishes). So its not biggest flop.
    Two: You have to think about the practical consequences also when you are taking a decision as this is not a movie, its a real life. So its a biggest flop.
    But according to Gita, when you do something for the wellfare of others(people) or the whole world, seek
    nothing in return and give the result(papam/punyam (I thought of writign in in english, but i guess there is no word for \’punyam\’ in english but they do have a word for papam though…i.e. sin) to god  , you won\’t get any sin. And when something is not a sin, how come its a biggest flop?

  25. Vumsy says:

    "Kevvvvvvvuuuuuuu" aney keka veyadam tappa… I have no other reaction….I had this same reaction when ->I first realized that Andy Dufresne escaped from Shawshank, in a tunnel that he took 20 years to make.. (The Shawshank Redemption)->I first realized that Dr. Malcolm Crowe is actually a dead man. (The Sixth Sense)->I first realized that Alfred Borden had a twin, indeed, as Mr. Cutter suspected. (The Prestige)->I first realized that Anitha dies in an accident. (7G Brindavan Colony)->I first realized that Shankar Nagre is shot dead (Sarkar Raj)In all the above instances, my reaction was "I dint see that coming"…Just when I thought, you and your blog were getting predictable, you are back to being what you are best at.. "Unpredictable"….. Kudos…Also, I am not sure that if its just a co-incidence that a Big-Bang happened, although artificial, just about the same time you revealed a dimension of your personality that you never did earlier, atleast as I far as my knowledge about you is concerned.

  26. gouravaraju says:

    you said you cried because of that biggest flop than your father\’s death. but i think it was because of your father\’s the interview on Ntv today you said you have no patience to make a historical film. do you have respect for our heros who faught for our independence? i think you will make a patriotic film better than anyone because you carry emotions very intensly.

  27. Unknown says:

    Your father is still alive. He helped somebody even after his death. “May his soul rest in peace”, and we understand the way you wanted to care your mothers’ feelings and concerns. We too feel that pain.
    You said “your mom always talks about your father’s beautiful eyes”. I think your father never wanted leave his beloved wife even after his death, so, he found a way to live in virtual world to feel her love and therefore donated his eyes and body. Your “Mothers love is great. Her love is still living”.
    We thank you for sharing your personal experience with your “beloved fans”. “Like father like son”.
    You are great.

  28. Sai says:

    I was reminded of this post of yours again today and I just thought of something..I have always found your personality to be very intriguing. After reading your blog posts, even more so (and partly because I don\’t know you personally). That was probably the reason why I felt that a fictionalized biopic kind of film featuring a character derived from the various nuances of your own personality and incidents from your own life might make a compelling film.Just a thought..

  29. Narendra says:

    To Vumsy,
    All thanks to you now that I cannot watch "The Prestige"

  30. Sanjay says:

    ..reminds me of my li\’l sister..she\’s got the same quickness n amazing attitude in dealing with difficult situations…Some medicines are not available in the store…Bravo !!

  31. Unknown says:

    Mr RGV,
    We are having a striking resemblance of attributes, when i was reading through this post, i was got little emotional (though i never express it).
    My question is y is that we are so different, for instance, ppl pass pleasentaries saying Hi, bye take on it is such a fake and irritating etiqutte of a human (its my feeling). 
    I honestly feel that every human is an actor, they play different roles at different walks of life. The biggest dramas are the social gatherings..its a fuking lunatic feast, when i try to show happy face, (i have to try being a part of society) results in a constipating smile.
    Finally, how do i follow my vision. Im serious abt film-making but only in thinking process, but im here doing a monotonous, boring, day job…
    How do i break this………..n be you.

  32. Neeta says:

    Hello RGV, Sanjay, Celeste and vidyarthie,
    Wow, RGV – you are back to your humourous sarcastic self again! Bravo – you certainly gave me something to really laugh about in your response section of the blog!! Yes, Sanjay – I am back! RGV, that was quite the story – about your Dad\’s death – isn\’t it amazing how we each deal with grief in such a different way. It was great to see that you obviously cared a lot for your mother, in order to go to  such lengths to prevent her from grieving for too long. Special hello and greeting Sanjay, Celeste and vidyarthie … Oh, I do miss Thailand and India! 🙂
    Smiles and Hugs!
    Neeta – once again back on Earth!

  33. Ravi says:

    Yet another side of RGV! Thankfully, the pleasant \’human side\’ – the real RGV !
    Though I don\’t concur with your justification for assuming your act to be the \’biggest flop\’, I strongely think…that, one, so-called \’big flop\’ spared you from \’flopping\’ forever in your life! If you haven\’t gone by your father\’s wishes (just to avoid your mother\’s poignance), you would have been haunted by that guilt forever in your life resulting to more \’flops\’. So, be consoled for making that one \’big flop\’.
    So, there\’s always more to learn from \’flops\’ than \’hits\’! Do you bet to differ, Ramu ?

  34. Unknown says:

    I should not post this here as it is not related to the topic. But there is something which is bothering me about Tom Hagen since 1995. Yes, The character in "The Godfather". { When I read The Godfather for the first time }. Why was Tom Hagen kicked out of the "consigliere" post?. As the great Mario Puzo is dead… I would consider your answer on the matter. That Tom was not a "wartime" consigliere is pure nonsense. Because later Tom says… "…I put on my Sicilian hat… and figured it". Then Mike says "…It\’s a luxury I cannot afford anymore….". I really want your opinion. Sir.Thanking YouQoheleth Ecclesiastes.P.S.: When I was fifteen I was told that… When the Wise Man points his finger to the moon. The fool looks at the finger. But at 28 (now) … I realised that nothing can stop the Wise Man in his immense wisdom from showing his middle finger.

  35. Unknown says:

    You are in India… Sir."What is the greatest of wonders?" Asked The Yaksha.Yudhishtira also called Dharmaraja answers… "Everyday men die in their hundreds… But those alive think they would stay for ever."But at a personal level… Sir, I feel… Those who die… die, not because the body is incapacitated but because they decided to leave the body. I feel the out of body experience is too tempting. To understand what I am saying… Leave death alone. Try resisting sleep…I will see how many will be successful. { And try not to go crazy. } I have read too much spiritual literature to overrule my own views now… I may be wrong… Or, May be… I am right… And too right at that.

  36. k says:

    I guess you wrote this blog just moments before I saw you. Yes, I am the same girl from NTV crew who was watching your show live standing behind the cameras. Nice blog indeed. I could picturise whatever you wrote. Well, let me not comment on the content as I am much younger to be philosophical. lol.
    Keep posting. Would love to see what you write.

  37. baneera says:

    Dear RGV
    Tell me how many people get a chance to fulfill their parent\’s wishes and how many have the will to go against the wishes of the relatives/society. I think u did absolutely the right thing at the right time and I am sure your dad will be proud of u. Agood man wanted a good deed done by helping others after he is gone…kudos
    I am sure he must be thinking to himself how do i care what RGV thinks if it\’s his flop or a hit…I have done the right thing and that\’s all matters.
    Imagine if u had to live with the guilt of not fulfilling his last wishes…..!!! You probably are able to sleep well now becoz of that good deed (certain deeds can\’t be quantified as hits or flops)
    Nice to know that u have some emotions and are happy to share with people who care…i.e the fans!

  38. Unknown says:

    hey ramu,                                                                                                                                                                                          i questions u, that how many persons remembers their belongings intentions even after 9years of their past away,why didn\’t u think in the other side of ur feelings "that u achieved ur fathers wish & u even made ur mothers love to be alive by donating ur fathers eyes even today",& finally, r u never felt that "a cry for parents resembles a love towards them"?                             and apart from these queries,i myself answers u that ," u will be most lovable personality to ur mother for the entire life of her ,since just by ur respect it made ur fathers eyes to be alive even today".sorry , if i intention hurts u.

  39. Unknown says:

    hi rgv
    the best blog till date
    share wit us some more of ur real life screenplays
    this emotional side of urs behind the stern n blunt persona that u portray makes u a the creative person that u are
    keep expressing ur emotions
    thats the way to go

  40. Unknown says:

    I happened to read a novel, Antharmukham (Inner-Face)  from one of the famous telugu professional writer Yandamoori some time back. The novel was adopted from "Outsider"/"The Stranger" by Albert Camus. The novel was an absolutely fantastic one. For non-telugus, this is the same writer who adopted "The Exorcist" into telugu literacy a better way than "Phoonk" did it for Bollywood. And unfortunately Phoonk borrowed the plot from "Tulasi", not the soul.
    Anyways the preface for the "Antharmukham" was really touching. I somehow feel the similarity between this post and the preface of the novel.  Well, I will brief it here for those, who havent\’ gone through. Forgive me, I am not a master in story telling as like RGV and may not interest you. But, trust me, I am not an aspiring film maker in this life, even if given chance, I strongly feel I am incapable of handling it. I will narrate as told by writer, rather than narrating from my mouth.
    "Anyways, it was late 80s or early 90s. I was in Singapore, scripting for a James Bond style of movie of Chiranjeevi. The shoot was for some song and some action/romantic sequences. I was somehow feeling uneasy, you may call it instinct, and travelled back to Hyderabad the very next morning. When I reached home, I found out that my father is on death bed and is counting his last hours. There were all the relatives around. The whole house was mourning and my father was just looking into vaccum though his eyes. I saw his eye lids moving towards me. I fet it funny that only his lids were moving, not even face. Anyways after 3-4 hours he went into Coma and was just breathing. Doctor said that he may not survive the night.  We shifted the body (my father) into my room and all the relatives were asked to sleep in the hall. I was just sitting by his side and was occassionally giving his thulasi theertham.
    When it was around midnight I suddenly got a call. It was director of the movie. He is still in Singapore and is doing some songs and dances. He dint know the situation. He asked me if I could write a scene for the romance between lead pair as the shift writer was not available. I said yes and asked him to call back an hour. He called me back  after some time and I have read the whole scene which I wrote and he recorded all at his end and thanked me. After 2 more hours, my father died.
    At that time, I felt so detatched by not mixing my professional career with my personal life. But, later after some time, I felt guilty about it. I thought I would have told the director the situation and he would not have asked me to write the script. Did my father (or fathers\’ soul) heard me reading that script on romantic scene? how would he have felt? happy for being so detatched? or sad for being so materialistic?
    At that moment I happened to read Outsider by Albert Camus and felt like some of my questions were answered and am presenting you this book, which is inspired by the novel."
    This was the intro by the writer. And he happened to write the last novel, but career best, of his career. Can we expect something similar from this prolific director? Atleast last if its not career best….

  41. Brahma says:

    I remembered Mahatama Gandhi\’s autobiography- My Experiments with truth where in one of the chapter he explains about his father\’s death. Your writing for me exactly replicated Gandhi\’s writing. Only difference is that he couldnt be on his father\’s bedside in his last moments because of his carnal desire and you have controlled emotions in you and guilt that you couldnt make your mother spend her time with your dad coupled with the behaviour of the sisters who handled eye donation part has grown manyfold and had comeout when you met like minded people.
    All the best and thanks for unveiling your inner self  and sharing your emotions with us.

  42. vamsi says:

    Appreciate your guts to speak the truth. Even for a lack for better term no one would have used the word "film" if they wondered what kind of assole the world would think you are. But the reality is that the world does not matter. All that matters is the truth and having the guts to speak yourself out. Surprisingly, the only people who really speak the truth irrespective of what the world would consider them are – little kids (half built awareness – with all their tenderness, innocense and lack of understanding of what the world thinks of them) and old men (when it occurs to them that it no longer matters).
    Hence you are special. Even though you are an ass for scripting a screenplay at the wrongest of the times.

  43. E says:

    Hey RGV,
    Just as I was about to conclude by reading your earlier blog that you are an icy stone-cold person without any heart and feelings, you come up with this fascinating personal stuff. You began saying "just felt like sharing it…"..i still wonder why you are sharing this information..nevertheless it does confirm that you are not suffering from "Aristotlitis"..wherein a person spends most of the time in his head…overlooking his heart and feelings…the disease which Ayn Rand and so many of her followers are suffering…yes be logical…be rational..but only in the marketplace….while doing business…thats it…when you enter the domain of heart..the equations changes…nothing is logical anymore…there is a some other logic…it is supra-logic. But anyway RGV it was an touching account….
    Hey Neets/Sanjay…..
    Where are you guys…???

  44. Narendra says:

    To Sanjay K,
    Dont you think thats theres some thing common between indians and italians… ????
    – –  > You mean \’Sonia Gandhi\’ ??
    Sorry for poking my nose outta nowhere. Just for time pass.

  45. Srinath says:

    Perhaps the most touching story(with all the respect) you ever told us..
    It scared me..

  46. Neeta says:

    Oh my God – Ram, you have your best/fun fans back again! Ev, I see you are in action again – I so agree with what you have written! A wise owl at that – sorry I could not make it to Singapore to meet you in person! Sanjay – you are the best, – my adopted mom is Italian – and yes, there is so much in common between the Italians and Indian – above all, we love to eat and be loud about everything in life! Celeste, you and RGV are priceless! You with your fabulous e-mail, and RGV with his wonderful "soft" side – (RGV, just pretend that you didn\’t hear/read that!! – Of course, you are a tough cookie! 🙂  – Wouldn\’t want to ruin your tough image to the world!) But seriously, nice to see a gentle side to you. It doesn\’t mean you have to stop your sarcastic – humorous come backs to your fan\’s comments, please! RGV, where the heck were you when I came to Mumbai to visit you?! Seriously, do you guys meet up with your fans – especially if they treat you to a fabulous meal? Just wondering – so I can prepare Celeste to come hook up with you when she come to Mumbai!
    Hugs to you all,

  47. Vinay says:

    Hi Ramu
    You have done and thought what you liked, because of which you could be in a career you love most. And People like you are typically intolerant of maximum people who dont follow their heart. Still, what should people do who realize this late. Meaning there are scores of people who first dont have an aim. (Dont blame them though). Suppose someone is on the wrong side of 30, realizes that he should have gone into composing music, but currently stuck in a financial services world, where he\’s not making much headway. But has a family to support and cannot risk losing his job to follow his heart at all. After all the wife and kids need him to keep working to bring groceries home and pay that fat home loan. Really, is it the same that Howard Roark told Peter Keating, when the latter showed him paintings. "Its too late".

  48. Vinay says:

    I remember you broadcasting that people cry only to bring attention to themselves. I can plainly see that you cried because you remembered that you caused pain to your mother and not because you wanted attention. I am still being only mean.

  49. Unknown says:

    RG varma garu,challa baga Narrate chesyru ..

  50. Unknown says:

    Dear Mr. Varma,this is my first comment here (nothing great about it, it\’s just that I hate using Spaces. It doesn\’t allow OpenId. But then, this post is about a personal incident you shared.)Some thoughts:- I enjoy watching your films.. Yes there are times when they disappointing, but they are as good and as bad as other films.- I enjoy reading your blog more. It is thoroughly entertaining. Your posts, people\’s comments and your "reactions to reactions". You being outspoken about your thoughts and opinions just adds to the fun.- Regarding this post, I hope you are now ok with whatever happened and whatever you did, in 1994 and 2003. It is in the past anyway.Regards,Nirav

  51. Unknown says:

    what drives u?

  52. VJ says:

    Hi Ramophiles,The \’comedy-Naseeruddin Shah\’ got to be clarified. To me Raamu is still the typical Godavary brat. Every friends circle wud have a guy like Raamu among them i.e. gutsy, care-not, effoff, easygoing, tuff-talking, tuff-looking and take-it-easy nature; so lingo complies that nature. This expression of \’comedy\’ is considered normal by us. So when that \’comedy\’ caption is translated to English then it sounds horrible. So pl don\’t be harsh on him for that \’comedy\’ comment. Expression is lost in translation.

  53. confused says:

    …. silence………its 2 personal nd touching post…..ny comment will be a vulgar display of emotion….

  54. andhrabond says:

    The more funny than Naseeruddin shah episode is everybody in the blog is offering you a shoulder to cry on. I couldn\’t stop laughing when I am reading these posts where people are judging and showing pity on you (which irritate you more). It is like watching Karan Johar\’s movie. I dare you if you attemp to write something similar to your dad\’s post again. Although the post has lot of emotion which doesn\’t suit you. by the way I am curious to ask you couple of questions.
    1, did you get a chance to find out, what was the cause that your dad got the heart attach (don\’t give me some nonsense answer).
    2, do you have any idea what he would have spoken to you, if you were in front of him at the time of his death.
    (don\’t give me some nonsense answer).
    3, Any how you posted about your dad, I would like to know how was the relationship between you and your dad (or what was your dad\’s thinking about you, did you ever ask him) (again don\’t give me some nonsense answer).

  55. Unknown says:

    Hmmmm….It happened with me too… but didn\’t take me that long….

  56. Unknown says:

    How strong these emotions are…!!!!!   its impossible to hide them.
    when u have to cry,u will cry. even after 9 years of your father\’s death.
    That is their power.

  57. Unknown says:

    for me emotional display is more vulgar than wealth display.-ram gopal varma in some earlier post.The most exciting thing about life is contradictions.-ram gopal varma in another post.So were u excited at nana\’s house?

  58. gaurav says:

    I\’ve been in the US for 2 years and haven\’t kept up-to-date with Bollywood films. The last film I saw that was directed by you was DZH. Which of your 6 subsequent films would you recommend if I had time to watch just one of them?

  59. celeste says:

    @ SanjayK @ Narendra @ Neeta
    India-Italy connection?
    yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss !!!!!!!!!!!
    When Indians do not imitate the British or Americans and when Italians do not imitate the Europeans, we are very similar. We are the Indians of Europe, and you are the Italians of Asia. Both of us have 3000 years of shining history at our back. Both of us live in countries rich in art, nature, sun, good food, merry mood, love for music. Both of us are very creative and have an excellent taste for design (the first in the world). Both of us are friendly, love family (LA MAMMA) and religion.
    But there\’s something deeply different, I\’m afraid. Something tragically divides us:
    Y O U    P L A Y    A    H O R R I B L E    F O O T B A L L    !!!!!!!!
    (just kidding)

  60. Neeta says:

    Ah but Celeste,
    Ramu, Sanjay, Ev and Narendra do not know that you thought Cricket was Tennis!! My beautiful Celeste – the Indians will certainly have to edumacate you real soon! Ram – would you kindly teach this young lady a thing or two about Indian Sports! 🙂

  61. E says:

    Hey Sanjay../Neets../Celeste…Check this out>>Indians and Italians\’The Indians are the Italians of Asia,\’ Didier pronounced with a sage and mischievous grin. \’It can be said, certainly, with equal justice, that the Italians are the Indians of Europe, but you do understand me, I think. There is so much Italian in the Indians, and so much Indian in the Italians. They are both people of the Madonna – they demand a goddess, even if the religion does not provide one. Every man in both countries is a singer when he is happy, and every woman is a dancer when she walks to the shop at the corner. For them, food is music inside the body, and music is food inside the heart. The language of India and the language of Italy, they make every man a poet, and make something beautiful from every banalite. These are nations where love – amore, pyaar – makes a cavalier of a Borsalino on a street corner, and makes a princess of a peasant girl, if only for a second that her eyes meet yours. It is the secret of my love for India, Lin, that my first great love was Italian.\’ G.D.Roberts, Shantaram> Guys you r gonna laugh u r ass off…watch this Russel Peters..take on Indians and Italians.. and Italian Joke,A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation.The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:"Emma come first.Den I come.Den two asses come together.I come once-a-more.Two asses, they come together again.I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time.""You foul-mouthed swine, " retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don\’t talk about our sex lives in public!""Hey, coola down lady," said the man."Who talkin\’ abouta sexa? I\’m a justa tellin\’ my frienda how to spella Mississippi."CheersEV

  62. Neeta says:

    Oh my havens – Ev, I was in stitches with your little "Mississippi" spelled the Italian way! And yes indeed, Russel Peters is our very own Canadian fella – he is a classic! He does the Italian – Indian, but his Chinese – Indian one is hillarious as well! He gets every nationality out there – and we in Canada are a mosaic from all over and adore his wit and humour! Ramu, Celeste and Sanajay and all Ramu\’s "chellas", if you haven\’t seen Russel Peter\’s comedy – please do so – he truly is amazing. Ramu, he has your kind of humour – you will truly see eye to eye with him! Ev, as usual – thanks for your humour and wit! Take care – after being away for 6wks, can\’t get back into the swing of things – so off to Kelowna for a week end! Ciao you lot – don\’t have too much fun without me, please!! 🙂 Ramu, can you support Celeste and me – we would be awesome at promoting you in Italy and Canada!

  63. Naveen says:

    hi ramu, saw phoonk today……good movie but could have had some more thrills, the floating and flying looked silly…sudeep was superb, effortless perfomance……i always wanted to watch his kannada movies but couldn\’t, will try and watch one of his good ones soon….would be great to see more of him in your movies

  64. Brahma says:

    Not related to Ramu\’s blog but please spare two minutes.

    Have you observed near a function hall or near a hotel or food court in your city where you find huge food thrown away and on the otherside of the road poor people looking t food with moist eyes and moist tongue?
    Who says this country is poor? who says we dont have wealth in this country? There is lot but unfortunately we dont have a habit to share the same with the needy.
    No….Iam not promoting begging. iam not. Iam promoting prosperity thru sharing little bit of what we have. Is it difficult? let me demonstrate how wasy it is?
     If you smoke 5 cigarettes….10 cigaretted a day, can you reduce it by just 1 cigarette a day? If you drink 5 cups of tea a day in office/home, can you reduce 1 cup? How much do you save? 5 rupees. 5 Rupees can feed a needy child in a slum who is looking for milk. 5 rupees per head can help us fund a school/teacher a day in a village. Just imagine what a  god your 5 Rupees can do? What have you sacrificed to do such a good- Sacrificing 1 cigarette/ 1 cup of tea.
    What is the cost of luxurious lunch you have once a week? 1000 bucks. How many times do you go out in a month? 4 times? Can you reduce it by just 1 time? Saving – Rs.1000. What can your 1000 bucks give to needy? It can feed a family for a month or it can help fund a primary health centre. It all needs sharing little of what we have to the needy and we can definetely make our country far better. I would say we need not even  share if we can stop wasting what we have. Switch off your car near traffic signal. How much do you save everyday? Isnt it substantial? Close water taps everyday. Isnt it substantial? Stop food wastage. Isnt it substantial? Just have a walk around food courts in IT companies/ malls and you will find tons of food being wasted every day.
    So friends…. my appeal to you is…Save every waste. Save every drop and share with India. Make this country a better place to live.

  65. celeste says:

    Mr. Ram, all the bloggers: sorry for private use of this space.
    @ Neetaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
    Cricket is a sport, FOOTBALL IS A RELIGION
    @ EV
    The joke about Mississipi was GREAT. Unfortunately my spoken English is even worse than that…
    About \’Shantaram\’, the first no-English language edition was the Italian one. Roberts is very fond of my country and he spent a bit of time in Milan, playing guitar in the Underground stations to gain money.
    Another India-Italy connection: foreign tourists go to India or come to Italy thinking our countries aren\’t rich, are full of problems – politics corruption, criminality, mafia, dirty towns, trains always late… -, are places good to be visited but not to be lived. They arrive with their long legs, blond hair, blue eyes, and in a couple of days they forget their perfect countries and definitely fall in love with ours, with our colours, with our food, with our clothes, with our life-styles. They go away, at the end of their trips, well-Indianized or well-Italianized.
    The power of our SANGUE LATINO (latin blood). The power of your Indian blood. Very contagious.
    No need for both of us to imitate other peoples. WE ARE COOL (FIGHI) THE WAY WE ARE.

  66. Kakarlapudi says:

    You always mentioned that you never had any experience before \’Shiva\’. However, title credits for \’Rao Gari Illu\’ with ANR, credits you with Ast. Director and also as a producer of \’Superman\’ with NTR. Source IMDB.

  67. MJ says:

    Dude!if u were trying to scare with phoonk lemme tell u it was not at all scary….but ya your interviews on news channels and all the challenge thing scared me!!!! well to be more serious.. make movies SeRIOUSLY! but reallie admire ur guts!.. MJ

  68. Sanjay says:

    @Celeste, Neeta, EV and Narendra…. guys u know better than me..any italian corner gives me a feeling of home…feel like releived from gravity..10 years in america nothing tops pizza for me..Good that we dont find hollywoodish actors in Ramu\’s movies…about fine arts, nobody matches Rennaissance italy…Anyways thanks -all for sharing ur i see the nexus.

  69. Narendra says:

    To celeste,
    Cricket is a sport, FOOTBALL IS A RELIGION
    – – > Unfortunately in INDIA, Cricket is more than religion and Football is not even a sport (excluding north – east).

  70. Narendra says:

    I like Italy too, but can never forgive Italy for producing \’Sonia Gandhi\’ , oooff . . .

  71. Unknown says:

    Hi RGV, Am urbig fan. Whatever one says. A question , in one of your interviews u had mentioned that raaat is a terrible film compared to bhoot? I think the exact opposite. Pray tell me why u believed that bhoot was a better movie than raat?

  72. celeste says:

    @ Sanjayk: and any Indian corner gives me a feeling of home (you are a poet!)
    @ Narendra:
    * First: DO NO DARE TO INSULT ITALIAN FOOTBALL IF YOU LIKE LIVING !!!!! (I\’m speaking as a Godfather…)
    * Second: Italy produced Sonia Maino; India produced Sonia Gandhi… Anyway, she was born in an area highly loved by all Italians, because there THE BEST NUTS IN THE WORLD grow and transform themselves in THE BEST SWEET NUTS/CHOCOLATE CREAM OF THE WORLD: the legendary NUTELLA
    * Third: in Italy we love Nutella, then our \’Nazionale\’ (National Football Team), then \’La Mamma\’ (Mum is always Mum), then \’La Madonna\’ (NOT the popstar…)
    * Forth: you are SO silly to argue with a woman?!? Didn\’t YOUR mamma tell you it\’s a lost battle? (ehm: is \’Narendra\’ a male name?)
    * Fifth: I love you, my friend.

  73. Naveen says:

    hi ramu, saw the movie \’A Wednesday\’ today………it was amazing to see the two masters in action, naseeruddin shah and anupam kher, in a tight script……didn\’t feel that it was just 1.5 hours

  74. Narendra says:

    Hello sir. Heard that u r in vizag a couple of days back. Hope u had a good stay here.
    Read ur double Dhamaka interview in saakshi with Jagapathi Babu. My mom too read it and what she said after that made laugh. Here is what she said to me (without any change) " Ee interview chadivaaaka naakoka vishayam arthamayyindhi ra. RGV oka peddha thikkaloodani. Vaadu pelli chesukoka povatam manchidhe. Nela rojulake paaripoyi undedhi aa ammayi. Emotions leni mogudni ae pellam bharisthundhi? Nuvvu parva ledhu le. Mari antha peddha vedhav vi kaadhu. Neeku emotions unnayi. Chinna size vedhav vi, anthe. Veedu udharinchatam ayyipoyindhi industry ni, inka nuvvu nee annayya bhayaldheraara? Naa karma idhantha. "

  75. Unknown says:

    hi narendra
    can u pls translate into english

  76. Neeta says:

    Hey Narendra – I think you just put your "foot in your mouth" by telling Celeste that football is not even considered a sport in India!! What\’s your beef with Sonia Ghandhi anyway?
    Okay, Ram – what is Narendra telling you – ?? Ram, your article intrigued me – gut feelings tell me you are fairly emotional, despite your tough exterior – Good For You! No, I am truly not looking for a sarcastic come back on my comments! Although, I must admit – I get a "major kick", out of your comments – your responses deserve an award!! I deal with people all the time and at times their questions do deserve stupid answers!
    Ram/Sanjay/Ev/Celeste – Special Greetings! India and Thailand spoilt me – can\’t get back into the rhythem of things – took off to the Okanagan Valley! Havenly wk end.
    Peace and Love

  77. Unknown says:

    i strongly suspect a commercial motive in everything u do. Educate me. Justify it and give us the pleasure of a paradox.

  78. Unknown says:

    i strongly suspect a commercial motive in everything u do. Educate me. Justify it and give us the pleasure of a paradox.

  79. Unknown says:

    Dear RGV,It is incredibly cool to be able to directly communicate to you and to get juicy \’Inside\’ stuff straight from the horse\’ mouth. Thank you for taking this direct route.Somehow, it is convincing enough that everything we do is a type of \’Story telling\’. Your way of telling your dads death to your mom came out both as humane and honest.I am quite curious about your \’Garam Khabar\’. An interesting paradox is Garam Khabar, assuming it is a direct take on the media, has to rely on the same media for its promotion. Independent media has not attained critical mass in India yet.I cant wait to see how you are going to deal with this. Schadenfreud? :-)Regards,Prakash.

  80. Narendra says:

    Hi Neeta, I replied celeste via e-mail regarding that. Just don\’t wanna waste blog space. I still stand by what I said. Indians are not football exposed. I am one of them.Hi anar,If I translate it into english, the beauty of what I wanna say gets lost. So decided to leave as it ought to be. Sorry 4 that.

  81. sanjay says:

    Hi Sir!!Just read few of your very involving blogs. I was really surprised by honesty of your way of putting facts in words. In fact, the blogs about how you managed to get the break and make SHIVA were very interesting and in a way, inspiring as well. Wish you keep on writing many such blogs for us!

  82. Unknown says:

    Hi,Do you have used lcd screens, lcd monitor used, surplus lcds and scrap LCDs? Please go Stars).We are constantly buying re-usable LCD panels.The re-usable panels go through strictly designed process of categorizing, checking, testing, repairing and refurbishing before they are re-used to make remanufactured LCD displays and TV sets.Due to our recent breakthrough in testing and repairing technology of LCD, we can improve the value for your LCD panels.[geiieecdedgjjc]

  83. chigurala says:

    Dear Ramu,
    I dont think you should feel bad about the eyes that were donated, reason being that it was your fathers wish and secondly you said your mother have felt bad about the cut on the body. I understand your feeling, but the care we take on a living body is altogether different. See we are subjecting the dead body to the fire. May be you should feel the joy of others who has got benefitted from the eyes and that is what your father expected. Now coming back to the point of Nurses who were chatting and all, I think it is day to day duty and they are accoustomed to seeing such incidents on a regular basis. Other wise if they feel sad, they will be depressed in no time. In this regard I want to make a point if you go to any of the government hospitals there are so many ppl who want to make money out of severly sick or even on a corpse. And also you can find gathered are will not have any true intentions as blood relations, I believe.

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